I Dunno, But...

Respect the game. That's what it's about around here. Sports are more than stats. While opinions (funny & serious) and reviews of performances are posted, we discuss the business that sets the stage, the media that broadcasts and the history that engulfs. Most who comment on the game pick and choose based on media-friendliness, race and/or antics. We lay down more. We came from many of the same communities and played with many of the same athletes. It's about time the truth be told...

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Dumb

This may sound like a tinge of envy, but anyone with some form of common sense will nod their heads in agreement.

Normally, I stray from open commentary about the social lives of athletes and other entertainers because of a personal philosophy; ‘if it ain’t me, I don’t wanna hear it.’ However, in the advent of recent tell-alls from groupies in the entertainment industry, there is this uncomfortable acceptance of these players of the game. The issue is like a dodecahedron; it has many sides and hard to say without frustrating yourself. The notion that public figures have mistresses and slide-pieces is as old as the wheel, but there are as many stories as there are Final Fantasy games.

Karrine Steffans is the biggest name of the new millennium groupies thanks to her “Confessions” of one year ago. The list of SuperFriends, sorry, “Superhead’s” friends features ball players, rappers and the ever-appropriate porn stars. Her book has apparently inspired one from Carmen Bryan, who is in the middle of the Nas/Jay-Z beef from a minute ago. She also seems to have a Palm Pilot of names, one name being the Sixers’ Allen Iverson. Many who deal in the sports and entertainment industries would cry foul because there is a violation of the ‘rules of the game’: the only time a groupie is to be heard is in the bedroom, the groupie is never to be seen in public in the vicinity of the star, the groupie is not supposed to fathom contacting the star, etc. On the other hand, there are individuals who consider this sex-snitching as giving power and respect to the groupie herself, as if this rise to fame is not only necessary, but as empowering to others. Step back for a moment and ask yourself one question:

What?!?!

I’ve been a sportswriter for a short period of time (a year and a half, to be exact) and having been in the locker rooms and press conferences, it was always evident that win or lose, athletes look forward to unwinding just like the corporate raiders and entry-level grinders after a tough or even great day at the office. Yet, it is just as obvious that athletes enjoy the excesses just a little bit harder than those of us who don’t use our physical being to make a living. Outside the locker room (mostly for the home team), the wives, fiancées and companions await their men and hope to enjoy downtime together. The visitors, meanwhile, enjoy a night on the town with a few drinks, a blunt and throw a female or two with a couple Cam’Ron lines. Watch real closely though and there would be the groupie that thinks that she is close to the star, violating one of the groupie rules by being seen in the vicinity by us media folks and fans. Imagine what happens when the player’s chosen one finds out. Can you recall “Playmakers” on ESPN? Ever watched an episode of “The Footballers’ Wives” on BBC? Did you read a bit of “Confessions” at Barnes and Noble?

Prior to becoming a sports scribe, I worked in public relations for nearly a year. PR is not for the weak-hearted, but the lessons on the truth about glamour industries are everlasting. Many people in this business believe that the bibles of the industry are Rush and Malloy, Page Six and People Magazine. While there are great efforts in publicity of consumer affairs, health care and public works, a publicist will never be more famous than if (s)he has a feature about seeing so-and-so at a midtown lounge with someone other than the significant other. The scary aspect of this is that the groupie is well aware of this and knows this is an advantage. Suddenly, there’s a new Marilyn Monroe. Suddenly, her story comes about on how she wanted to be in Hollywood or wanted to have a record deal, but life happened and there were some choices to make. Someone says she is (or some parts of her are) beautiful enough to appear in videos and can hopefully meet some power brokers in entertainment. She’s told that she may have to show a different kind of talent in order to make a name for herself. She gets involved with someone a little more than expected and after getting too close or ticking off the wife, she is kicked to the curb for another, who would be just happy enough to be the next. Now, she’s pissed. Now, she decides it’s time to tell the fans the truth about their heroes. Now, she enlists in the help of… a book publisher and a PR agency. It’s time for the story to be told and for some lawyers to revisit prenuptial agreements.

As a heterosexual black male, I should admire entertainers for the ability to have any woman his disposal just by recognition. Yet, the greatest trapping of fame in this modern world is that your private life can be thrown out there with relative ease; all of your mistakes and transgressions overshadow your accomplishments and contributions. The problem here is that these tell-alls give insights to what is in all honesty, none of our business. It may come off as high and mighty, but the fact is that whether it is public knowledge or not, all parties in some degree are disgraced. The groupie gets hell from other stars, groupies and women’s liberation groups. For a short while, the athlete gets his name thrown all over the media for reasons other than his latest game. The woman sitting at home, who was not blind to it all, has to deal with whispers, disappointed parents and the same media that is hounding her man. At days’ end, it’s still cheating, it’s still disloyal and it’s still between the three involved, not us.

As a young professional in the sports media world, these stories bother me because they take up space. Now, there are many media heads themselves who act a fool just as bad as the players in order to keep up, yet my story about how the Giants’ defense desperately needs their starting defensive ends back gets bumped because of these affairs is a problem. Sports media is already full of redundant and unintelligent banter, but to add the gossip pages takes away from stories that actually say something relevant. The logic always goes that these are public figures and whether it is fair or not; people need to know what is going on with their favorite celebrities. Which leads to the real heart of the matter.

Did these groupies not learn from Monica Lewinski? She was only linked to former President Bill Clinton. She only happened to have been the fuel to the fire of Republicans for the last decade in the most powerful country in the world. She only happened to be the figure behind the first impeachment of a President in 130 years. You’re talking about the most powerful and most scrutinized position in the world, the Presidency of the United States. She was an intern, looking to make a name for herself in the political arena, a place where decisions actually affect the daily motions of society. She had sixteen minutes of fame considering that it was Clinton that she had the affair with. "I'm well-known for something that isn't great to be well-known for”, Lewinski said a few years back. It not only dragged her down and impacted Clinton’s credibility in his second term, but many others were ruined because of her affair. If she couldn’t become a major player in the game from the President of the United States, what makes you think that these vixens, video hoes, “aspiring actresses” are suddenly going to run SonyBMG or Universal Studios because they had sex with an athlete or musician? What’s the point? Is fifteen minutes of fame worth it?

I can hear the words now: I’m a hater, I’m jealous, I’m attacking them. This stuff is none of our business and any celebration of it makes us apologists for those who play this game. Is it different because this happens to involve people with public personas and million-dollar contracts? No, because it’s still fooling around with someone waiting at home. If athletes want to bed multiple women, that’s their business. If their spouses want to stick with them and spend their cash as part of the deal, it’s their business. If the groupie wants to keep going, it’s her business. Yet, if it’s wrong in your private life, there’s no way to bend that rule for our favorite celebrities. And there is no way that real power can be gained from giving a little…

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